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Poet, scrivener, and confirmed nonichenik. Available for freelance assignments. Visit me at denisesheltonwrites.com.

QUICK LINKS — MUST-READ STORIES — BY CATEGORY

Fascinating Females from History

Weird History

Haiku

Rhyming Poetry

(Please note: This index is under construction. Check back as I will be…


Attention aging men: Target has your back, snowflakes

(Target’s super-secret special men’s hair color section.) Photo by Denise Shelton

Well, slap me silly and butter my biscuits! Retail America has finer feelings after all.

If you’re a man thinking about covering your gray hair, you might be shy about shopping for a solution. After all, it’s women who’ve cornered the market on vanity, right? A man’s man wouldn’t dream of coloring his hair. That’s for actors, newscasters, and other makeup-wearing individuals.

Unfortunately, when you find yourself on the shady side of 50, and you’re looking for a job, knocking a few visual years off your look might be a good idea, especially at a time when ageism in hiring…


The phone call I was dreading came last night, and I’m reeling

Photo by Ben Rosett on Unsplash

“May the odds be ever in your favor.” — The Hunger Games

Something made me pause at the bottom of the stairs. My husband, in his home office above me, was on the phone with someone from work. I never listened in before, but this time I did.

His boss told him the company was reorganizing. As a result, he and seven colleagues have the opportunity to reapply for their own jobs. Not only will they be competing against each other, but they will also be up against candidates from both inside and outside the company.

Bad news for anybody…


And what to do if it isn’t

Photo by Thought Catalog on Unsplash

“As I remember your eyes
Were bluer than robin’s eggs
‘My poetry was lousy,’ you said
Where are you calling from?
A booth in the Midwest” —Diamonds and Rust by Joan Baez

How do you know your poetry isn’t any good? If you’re Joan Baez, Bob Dylan will tell you. Then you’ll go on to write one of the best songs ever about love lost. Way to go, Joanie!

If you, like me, are a poet published on Medium, none of your poems are worth reading. According to Anthony, a guy on this platform, all the poems published on Medium…


Why you shouldn’t wait for Black Friday deals, especially on toys

Photo by Dollar Gill on Unsplash

Last year’s holiday season was disappointing, to say the least. Most of us did not get to see our friends and family members, let alone share holiday meals or exchange gifts in person due to the pandemic. Hopefully, this year will be a bit better, but you should be aware of several factors that may impact your seasonal plans and adjust accordingly. Here are a few tips to make your season brighter.

1 — Do your gift shopping now, even online

You may have heard that a toy shortage is brewing, but the reasons behind it will impact…


But there is one big decision you’re free to make right now

Photo by Vika Strawberrika on Unsplash

We Americans are big on freedom.

Webster’s dictionary lists “the absence of necessity, coercion, or constraint in choice or action” first in its definitions of the word. Our national anthem boasts that the United States is “the land of the free.” Our Declaration of Independence mentions the word “free” five times. When we parted from Great Britain, we started calling ours “a free country.”

We also like the word “liberty.” The first definition Webster lists for that word is “the power to do as one pleases.”

The opinion expressed within this article is that of the authors and not necessarily…


The irrepressible Edward “In-You-Go” Jones was caught in the palace three times. So naturally, the Queen was not amused.

Portrait of Queen Victoria by Edmund Thomas Parris, 1837 (Source: The Cooper Gallery)

Queen Victoria was a newlywed the first time an outsider penetrated palace security. Dressed as a chimney sweep, a young teenager found his way into her bedroom in 1838. His name was Edward (aka Thomas) Jones, and he was obsessed with Her Majesty. Luckily, the Queen was not in residence at the time and was spared the encounter.

Who’s been sleeping in HM’s bed?


My cowgirl days are apparently over

Photo by Michael Peltier on Unsplash

“Above the hills, higher than eagles we’re gliding
Suspended in the sky
Over the hill
Straight for the sun we were riding
My eyes were filled with light” — “Chestnut Mare” by The Byrds

At least once a year for ages, I’ve put my feet in the stirrups and imagined free-falling off a cliff on that chestnut mare, but no more. That’s because the political corrections officers have been at it again.

I had my annual lady parts inspection today. If you don’t know, this involves taking your clothes off, donning a hospital gown open in front, sitting on an…


No arguments, please. Feel free to leave them in yours.

Photo by Mick Haupt on Unsplash

Bev Potter recently wrote a swell listicle called Ten Things I Absolutely Hate. This inspired me to write my own list. I agree that Bev’s ten things are all hate-worthy, but, as Bev pointed out, ten items don’t begin to cover the topic. The items on my list might be a little more obscure, but perhaps you can relate to some of them.

  1. My world can do without me always getting stuck replacing the toilet paper roll. It recently came to light that my husband has been avoiding this task, possibly for decades, by reaching for an unused roll under…

Denise Shelton

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